Day 69

One day short of 70, a bunch of days short of him coming home. 70 days seems okay, not too long now and I will be telling you we are at the "halfway point" to that magical day...don't know what day that will be but I sort of have an idea. So in honor of the almost 70th day I will recap all I have done since he has left and how things (in my head) have changed.

May...what did I even do in May? Absolutely nothing. Not kidding. I hardly got out of bed, I spent the majority of the day wandering around wondering what to do with myself. I used half the bottle of his cologne, never took off his t-shirt, and filled my room with all of his things. It was almost creepy. In fact, I still have his gallon of Razor Water...Marine Corps water and the motto is: Cuts through thirst! I spent May trying to figure out my place in the world without the hubby around, trying to get used to not being the "housewife". I didn't like this at all. You may recall me complaining a lot, and wanting to clean a lot. My head was full of sadness and I constantly felt confused. I was definitely missing my best friend. I know, I know, kind of annoying. I did however, pay off all of our bills and manage to get some things taken care of.

June...this was the month I was waiting for when it was May. School started on the first and I was extremely happy to be doing something. It got tough, the 4 week courses were difficult. But, I made it through and received my final grades today. Like I said before, I got a B in English and I found out I got an A in History. Now that it is over, I feel very accomplished. I bought our furniture, started buying things to decorate with and got very excited to come to Cali for two weeks. I met some pretty amazing people in June and overall, the month went by pretty fast. I didn't have much time to be in my head, but whenever I did have time, the sadness creeped in. I did wish that Weikle could be home to see how good I was doing, to be proud of me.

July...finally we are in the month of July. Started off with July 1st and the hubby's two week paycheck. The checks that include combat pay, like a few hundred dollars is worth my husband risking his life? Ok, to him it is. But to me, I worry and I don't give a shit about the money. July 4th was spent at San Juan Capistrano Park, an event where the hubby's battalion was raising money for the Marine Corps Ball this year. It was fun, there wasn't much to do because neither me or my friend have kids, she will soon though. She is about 7 weeks away from bringing little Erik into the world. The rest of the time I have been in Cali we have been shopping, sleeping, and eating. When I brought the power of attorney to the apartment complex I was almost completely sure that they were not going to let me sign a lease for Weikle. They spent about 20 minutes looking through it to find something that said I could sign a lease. Well, when Weikle and I were signing and filling out the power of attorney before he left I remember telling him to sign a particular box (He didn't give me a General Power of Attorney because we didn't need it). Anyway, the box said to accept military quarters on his behalf and he said "Why do I need to sign that? You aren't going to get base housing?" and I said, "Just sign it". If it wasn't for that one box being signed, I would not have been able to get the apartment. Once again, I was right. In your face babe! I was right! Ok so not that big of a deal, just tooting my own horn because it makes me feel good. So, California has been very successful. I got the apartment, got my oil changed on base, bought Disneyland tickets for this coming week, got the license plates for my car, and managed to have a good time and relax. July has been a great month and we are only 8 days in, let's hope the next 22 are good too. I feel as though the days are getting harder, even though I am not sad. The days just feel never ending and meaningless. I miss you babe, and life just isn't life without you here. It's actually not even half as good, not even a little bit good, it just sucks. Just keep on keepin on right?

In August...my birthday! The hubbs will be missing it, but it's not that great anyway. Just a birthday. I will have somewhere around 60 more that he can be home for before I die, he can miss this one. Hoping I will at least get a phone call from him so he can tell me how much he loves me... Baby Erik will be born sometime at the end of August and I am hoping to make it back to Cali to be here for her when she delivers. The halfway point should be sometime during this month.

September.... Of course this month will be awesome, I will be on my way to Cali and moving in. Time to decorate, help my friend decorate and hopefully get everything squared away before the men come home. Better to be prepared early, in this case, quite a bit early. This month is also the month me and the hubbs met. September 22, 2009 was the day my life made a complete 180. Hard to believe that it has almost been a year.

October... the 4th will be my parent 25th wedding anniversary so I will probably be making a trip down to Arizona to celebrate with them. Not much else going on in October except counting down the days.

November-December....Somewhere in here I should be standing in the parking lot holding a sign and welcoming home my babe. Ughhh, so exciting yet so depressing right now. Seems like its forever away.


Off to Newport Beach in the morning! Hope everyone has a great weekend.