Thursday, July 29, 2010
Started packing things today, mostly just stuff I have bought for the apartment. 4 weeks until I am on the road back to Cali. It's coming up quick. I have a lot to do and quite a few people I want to see before I leave. Once I am gone, not sure when I will be back or where we will be getting stationed.
Hope ya'll liked the picture as much as I did, and hope everyone has a great weekend :]
Monday, July 26, 2010
This will also be my bed for 2-3 months before he comes home. I don't want to pick out a mattress without him so it is just me and the couch for awhile. I don't mind though, I don't like the feeling of an empty bed anyhow. I mean, right now I am sleeping on a twin bed for that reason so a couch will be about the same. Tell me this thing isn't going to be awesome!
A couple weeks ago I bought two end tables at HomeGoods for $50. They were off-white and really cute, the problem was that they weren't wood. Well this weekend my Mom and I went into Goodwill as a last minute place to look; knowing that I wanted old furniture to fix up the way I wanted. We found two end tables that matched, we thought they were 12.99 a piece, but they ended up being 12.99 for both! What a deal. So today I am sanding them down so I can get ready to paint them. I turn the table over to sand the underneath parts and saw names burned into the wood and was thinking "Who puts their name on end tables?". Well I read the name and it said Ethan Allen. So there you have it, Ethan Allen end tables for the big cost of 13 bucks. That is why they were made with such nice wood and heavy glass. So here are the before and after pictures of my end tables! :] The first is before, the second is after.
And you can't really tell in the picture, but it is antiqued now. Ralph Lauren makes a glaze that you can buy in whatever color you want to antique your walls, furniture, etc.
Well the husband said that all we have really talked about the past week is furniture, and I said "That's all I've got at the moment".... just me and my furniture/decorating projects. So like I told him, this is all I have to talk about.
And this is me, sucking it up and making it through the next 130 days or so. This is me, deciding I won't be wearing make-up unless I am going somewhere important. And this is me, trying to keep up my figure for the hubbs - P90x is amazing.
Time for my workout and then watching movies til I can no longer keep my eyes open. Have an amazing week everyone!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Going to the Diamondbacks vs. Giants game tonight, me and the fam have 3rd base box tickets which apparently are amazing seats (135 dollars each ticket). Not a huge fan of baseball but I have nothing else to do, so why not? I guess we will be right down by the field so look for us on TV :]
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Finally got to speak with my husband. Unfortunately, under the circumstances he was in, he has ant bites all over his body now. Other than that, the sand box is treating him well. Hopefully when he gets back to where he is originally supposed to be he will have 3 of my packages waiting for him. It seems like the longer he is gone the more I need/want to talk to him. Like 15 to 30 minutes every week is just not enough. We have talked more often than that before but now that he is out and about, it has slowed. We get off the phone and I feel like I need to talk to him again - I neeeed more of him. We talked about things I have bought for the house, things he has been doing while "out and about". He was very talkative and was pretty stoked to tell me all the things he has done. It was nice to hear the excitement in his voice and get some emotion out of him. Almost three months down so of course were missing some things like crazy, like umm "it". Soo we talked a lot about what that will be like when he comes home and just how damn attractive we both are and how much we need one another (haha). Sorry for the TMI's in the lives of the Weikle's.
I'm just really hoping that we can Skype, even once. It might not be great for him because I will most likely be crying the majority of the time. It might not even be a good thing to Skype with him at all. I mean, won't that make me want to Skype with him again? And if he's gone and we can't, I will be bummed out. Skype is like the ice cream I shouldn't eat, because if I do I know I will want some tomorrow too. I reallllly want too though. To look at him, to see those green eyes and great bone structure...his hair, I always loved feeling the back of his head after his haircut. I miss that just-shaved feeling. I can't imagine looking at him, seeing him sitting there while I am sitting here. I want to look him in the eyes and tell him how much I love and need him, and I want to watch him say it back. Just once would do. His face, after it hasn't been shaved in awhile, that is what I want to see. I want to smell his smell, the way he smelt after a long day at work. The way he smelt after a shower, every time I smell Old Spice I remember washing his back for him. And I can't smell him or feel him but I am dying to see him, literally dying. It's too bad I couldn't record our conversation so I could watch it whenever I needed too. Well, who knows. I shouldn't be daydreaming about this, don't know when/if it is going to happen anytime soon.
Ab workout and then movie time. It's going to be a late night.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Haven't spoken to the hubby in awhile, starting to worry even though I shouldn't. Last I heard he was somewhere new and had an ear infection. He was trying to go to medical to get something to clear it up, sure hope he did. I feel helpless when something is wrong and I can't do anything about it. I miss him so much tonight, probably because we haven't spoken in awhile. I am hoping he gets ahold of me soon, my stomach can't handle all of these butterflies. Also, found out today that it may be possible for him to Skype with me once he is back where he is supposed to be and all. Just downloaded it on my computer. I hope it's Skype that they use? I didn't think about asking what program it is or how it even works. Hmm, we will see. Sending him another package on Monday, this one includes new headphones and two hallmark cards. Maybe some gas station items too.
Went shopping today with my mama. Got some random things for the apartment; sheets, cheese grater, centerpiece, end tables for the living room.... of course I got great deals because that's who I am - bargain shopper. Can't go into detail until after I talk to Weikle and tell him about this stuff first.
Off to bed, hopefully sleep comes easy.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
I was remembering today the morning after we got married. We were checked into a hotel in Bellville, Ohio. It was snowing, freezing outside, and of course we were both ecstatic. I had bronchitis, horrible bronchitis and I had been coughing up blood on his pillow all night and we each probably got 3 hours of sleep. Poor guy. I think he got up to make me hot tea and get me a cold rag at least ten times. He has been allergic to perfumes/dyes/colognes since right before I met him. We think it has to do with too many immunizations from the corps. Anyway, the hotel sheets apparently had been washed in scented detergent and he was covered in hives. His lip had decided to swell to twice its normal size also. We were a mess... Weikle told me that he was going to drive me to the hospital because I wasn't doing good. When we got there we checked in and were walking away when the lady at the desk saw his lip, she asked if he needed to be seen too and we both started cracking up. Here we were, honeymoon morning, in the hospital and both feeling like hell. The term "in sickness and in health" was well used. I was talking to him trying to keep his mind off itching and he is helping me stop coughing and helping me throw up. Two man team and absolutely perfect for one another. I would rather speak with him once a week, once a month, for the rest of my life than to never be with him. He is the voice I want to hear some day when I'm 90, the wooden rockin chair I want rockin right beside me....
Monday, July 12, 2010
So it has been 73 days ladies and gentlemen. Wishing I could just throw a one in front of the 73 but I don't have the power to change time, or the power to do anything really. What a bummer. I can't believe I am doing this deployment thing, at times I feel like it's not real, like I could just bring him home when I want to or call him when I need to talk. But no. It's completely real and I'm going stir crazy counting down these days. My math skills are improving, that's a plus. I feel very repetitive when I write about this but it's the elephant in my head. I can't NOT miss him. It's all I think about and it's all I feel.
The upside to this "gloominess" is that we are almost halfway through July, halfway to a new month and higher numbers.
Off to the pool for some relaxation...
Friday, July 9, 2010
The bed feels especially empty. Why do some nights seem worse than others? It's not because I am in a condo, not because I am not in my own bed. Where is my own bed? Where is home? Home is where I make it, and right now - I haven't made it anywhere. My parents house is my old home, it's not the same. My friends house actually did begin to feel like home. It was nice having someone around, someone who was doing the same thing everyday. I won't have a home until September. So until then, I feel like every bed gets more and more empty and I feel like the more time that goes by the less I can remember of how things were. I try to look at pictures and when we talk I try to bring back memories. It feels so good to talk about things we used to do together, I can't even explain how good it feels. So maybe tonight I am having a bad night and just feeling gloomy. Whatever, it's expected right? Well it has been 70 days since I last saw the hubby in the flesh, 70 days since I felt him, and 70 days since I have felt normal. I'll be fine when I wake up I'm sure; off to dreamland and hoping to see him.
I love you babe. Forever and Ever, Amennn right?
Your the one I'd lay down my own life for, and your
everything I've ever wanted, everything I neeeed,
I talk about you I go on and on and on. Because you're
everything to me....
Thursday, July 8, 2010
May...what did I even do in May? Absolutely nothing. Not kidding. I hardly got out of bed, I spent the majority of the day wandering around wondering what to do with myself. I used half the bottle of his cologne, never took off his t-shirt, and filled my room with all of his things. It was almost creepy. In fact, I still have his gallon of Razor Water...Marine Corps water and the motto is: Cuts through thirst! I spent May trying to figure out my place in the world without the hubby around, trying to get used to not being the "housewife". I didn't like this at all. You may recall me complaining a lot, and wanting to clean a lot. My head was full of sadness and I constantly felt confused. I was definitely missing my best friend. I know, I know, kind of annoying. I did however, pay off all of our bills and manage to get some things taken care of.
June...this was the month I was waiting for when it was May. School started on the first and I was extremely happy to be doing something. It got tough, the 4 week courses were difficult. But, I made it through and received my final grades today. Like I said before, I got a B in English and I found out I got an A in History. Now that it is over, I feel very accomplished. I bought our furniture, started buying things to decorate with and got very excited to come to Cali for two weeks. I met some pretty amazing people in June and overall, the month went by pretty fast. I didn't have much time to be in my head, but whenever I did have time, the sadness creeped in. I did wish that Weikle could be home to see how good I was doing, to be proud of me.
July...finally we are in the month of July. Started off with July 1st and the hubby's two week paycheck. The checks that include combat pay, like a few hundred dollars is worth my husband risking his life? Ok, to him it is. But to me, I worry and I don't give a shit about the money. July 4th was spent at San Juan Capistrano Park, an event where the hubby's battalion was raising money for the Marine Corps Ball this year. It was fun, there wasn't much to do because neither me or my friend have kids, she will soon though. She is about 7 weeks away from bringing little Erik into the world. The rest of the time I have been in Cali we have been shopping, sleeping, and eating. When I brought the power of attorney to the apartment complex I was almost completely sure that they were not going to let me sign a lease for Weikle. They spent about 20 minutes looking through it to find something that said I could sign a lease. Well, when Weikle and I were signing and filling out the power of attorney before he left I remember telling him to sign a particular box (He didn't give me a General Power of Attorney because we didn't need it). Anyway, the box said to accept military quarters on his behalf and he said "Why do I need to sign that? You aren't going to get base housing?" and I said, "Just sign it". If it wasn't for that one box being signed, I would not have been able to get the apartment. Once again, I was right. In your face babe! I was right! Ok so not that big of a deal, just tooting my own horn because it makes me feel good. So, California has been very successful. I got the apartment, got my oil changed on base, bought Disneyland tickets for this coming week, got the license plates for my car, and managed to have a good time and relax. July has been a great month and we are only 8 days in, let's hope the next 22 are good too. I feel as though the days are getting harder, even though I am not sad. The days just feel never ending and meaningless. I miss you babe, and life just isn't life without you here. It's actually not even half as good, not even a little bit good, it just sucks. Just keep on keepin on right?
In August...my birthday! The hubbs will be missing it, but it's not that great anyway. Just a birthday. I will have somewhere around 60 more that he can be home for before I die, he can miss this one. Hoping I will at least get a phone call from him so he can tell me how much he loves me... Baby Erik will be born sometime at the end of August and I am hoping to make it back to Cali to be here for her when she delivers. The halfway point should be sometime during this month.
September.... Of course this month will be awesome, I will be on my way to Cali and moving in. Time to decorate, help my friend decorate and hopefully get everything squared away before the men come home. Better to be prepared early, in this case, quite a bit early. This month is also the month me and the hubbs met. September 22, 2009 was the day my life made a complete 180. Hard to believe that it has almost been a year.
October... the 4th will be my parent 25th wedding anniversary so I will probably be making a trip down to Arizona to celebrate with them. Not much else going on in October except counting down the days.
November-December....Somewhere in here I should be standing in the parking lot holding a sign and welcoming home my babe. Ughhh, so exciting yet so depressing right now. Seems like its forever away.
Off to Newport Beach in the morning! Hope everyone has a great weekend.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
I went apartment hunting on Saturday. The first place I saw was beautiful but the apartment seemed pretty small; it would have been a good apartment for me because I am tiny and everything was made for little people, but Weikle is bigger and likes more space. When he was still here we had went to In-n-Out and I noticed an apartment complex up the road, I told him I was going to have to check it out when I came back looking. Well, it just so happens that it was perfect and if everything goes good my move-in date is September 4th. I feel like screaming I am so excited. The place is beautiful and I just know it will be perfect. The complex has a fitness center, heated pool/jacuzzi, basketball court, and tennis court. The apartment has granite counter tops in the kitchen and bath, all new appliances, a pantry in the kitchen, and full size washer/dryer in a laundry room. The biggest reason I want it is because it is close for Weikle to get to work and it is right next to grocery shopping and restaurants. Let's hope today goes smoothly and I get this place!
Weikle is pleased with everything I have been doing, he says he is proud. He said he is very hot and tired; he said he is ready to come home now and be with me in the apartment. I said I know but we aren't too far away from the halfway point now, and before he knows it we will reach the 3 month mark (funny how I can say this to him but I don't even believe it myself!). It feels like it has been a lot more than 67 days, a lot more. I make sure and think about kissing him because I don't want to forget what it felt like. I remember our first kiss, he caught me off guard and I was blown away. At first I was thinking, "Does he just kiss girls like that all the time?" haha and then I realized he didn't. I used to always tell him when he would come home from work "Kiss me really good like the first time" and he would kiss me and I would feel everything all over again. It didn't matter how he kissed me, it did and always will feel that amazing.
Keep Weikle in your thoughts, I know what he is doing right now and I need all the prayers I can get. Just tell God you want Weikle to have fun, a lot of fun, but you also want him to watch his ass and be careful.
I will try to blog one more time before I head to Newport Beach on Friday, have a good week!
Thursday, July 1, 2010
I ended up with an 86% in my English class; this is a good grade but I'm disappointed, I promised the hubby an A and I promised myself an A. I gave it my all, and my all just wasn't good enough this time. And I will say that it was tough, it was tough focusing on English when the hubbs is at war. Just didn't seem important most days and I found myself daydreaming about him coming home. But English class didn't care that my husband is in Afghanistan and sadly, life doesn't care either. Life just rolls on by while I am stuck in my own little world. As long as it keeps rolling on by quickly I don't care. Just give me my best friend back...
My dad is back in the hospital for the 3rd time now in the past 3 weeks. Not sure what exactly is going on. My poor mom, countless hours in the hospital with him, continues to work, and taking care of things at home. Life is making its appearance in our family big time right now.
Not sure if I will for sure be going to Cali in the morning, because of my dads situation now. We will see. Not looking forward to the 5 hour drive, but I am looking forward to feeling like I am home again, California makes me feel closer to Weikle. Everything there reminds me of the times we had, loveeeee it :] Can't wait to get there and surround myself with beaches and friends. Hopefully my mood changes and I get some good ole'relaxation, endorphins need to fill my entire body so I can make it through the next 8 weeks. Moving back to Cali in September, can you say amazing?
Gotta go wash the car now, following the hubby's rules still!