Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Tick Tick Tick, Time is Going Fast

Wow. Where did March go? Oh ya, I was counting down the days til The Mr. got home! Always counting down the days. Well if you read my last post then you know that I was pretty shocked at the loss of Cpl. Porto. I still am. I can't help but think about it over and over in my head. I can't grasp that it actually happened, I can't imagine what his wife is going through. But besides that, things are going well here in Cali. Weikle got a three day weekend last weekend. He used it to catch up on sleep that he was lacking from the 36 days straight he spent working. I used it to do laundry for him, cook for him, and take him to buy a new car for me! (hehe) I love it. It was a slight upgrade from my 1992 Honda Accord that had 300k miles on it. We race each other out the door with the keys and push each other out of the way in the parking lot to drive it. I wear myself out and he always wins. Of course, I tell him that I let him win. We also went to the beach for a few hours, some relaxation was just what the doctor ordered. It was amazing to say the least.

Also, at the beginning of last week we went to the Pre-Deployment brief and were informed of quite a few things. Not a lot I can write about because of OSPEC. We did, however, get the address to where he will be. If you would like to have the address you may call or text me at this number: 602-377-7379. I cannot post it on facebook, nor will I be sending it through a message. Now, I will tell you that I will not be sending tons and tons of packages simply because he will have to carry it around. If you would like to send him something please keep that in mind. You may also want to ask me what he needs. I am hoping that we will be writing enough for him to tell me what he does and does not need. As of right now, writing is the only form of communication we will have.

And one last thing...

Note to self: NEVER go to the DMV in California again.
I went there last week and the line was wrapped around the building, I stood there for 30 minutes and didn't even move once, so I went home. I went back there yesterday and there was probably about 10 people in line. I was there for almost 4 hours. Not a fun experience. After I took the written test and passed it, the guy told me that my license will come in the mail no sooner than 4 to 5 weeks! Can you say ridiculous?

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Early Morning News...

I woke up this morning, which wasn't too long ago because me and the hubby stayed up until 2am playing Monopoly on Wii, and got online. I looked a few things up and then I realized that I hadn't read a blog that I had been following. I only follow one. She was the reason I started blogging myself. Her husband is a Corporal in the Marine Corps as well. He was deployed in December to Afghanistan. The dreaded location: Helmand Province, Afghanistan. She had their baby in January (just shortly after he left) and named her Ariana. Well for the past month and a half I have been reading her blog and I really liked it. So when I had realized this morning that I hadn't read her blog in about 2 weeks I was excited to have a lot to read about. Her post was titled "2 weeks" so I was hoping she hadn't posted in two weeks so I didn't miss anything. Well that was not the case. The "2 weeks" was the time since she had been told that the love of her life was killed in Afghanistan. She had CACO show up at her door on March 15th to tell her the news. I lost my breathe as I was reading this. I felt like I had known this woman and her husband. Both young, early 20's, and so in love. A feeling I could relate too. I started crying and still can't believe he his gone. I just cannot believe that the one blog I chose to follow this happens too. She had been organizing a sock drive to send a battalion a bunch of socks because they needed them. She had been going out with girlfriends, taking care of her daughter, getting through her deployment very well. And this happens. 4 months into the deployment. And she can do nothing about what has happened. This strong young woman doing so well can do nothing about what has happened to her husband. Pray and pray some more for Mrs. P and her daughter. Her family and his family as well. I know that with this happening it has brought on a feeling of "close to home" for me. REALITY once again.
Cpl. Jonathan D. Porto
If the Army and the Navy,
Ever look on Heaven's scenes;
They will find the streets are guarded
by United States Marines.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

I Sleep Alone So You Don't Have To...

The feeling I get when I wake up in the middle of the night and realize he isn't asleep next to me isn't a good feeling. It makes me miss him so bad that I can almost feel my heart hurting. And I get scared. You may think I'm being dramatic but just having that feeling and then knowing I am going to feel it everyday for 7 to 10 months is a lot to bare. It's not like he is going to be away for a long time, it's that he is going to be away for a long time in the worst place he could be. Three days and I get to feel safe again....for a little while anyway. These phone calls that I get from him every once in a while just aren't cutting it for me anymore. It's really hard for him to show affection to me on the phone because all day, everyday, he is a Marine who isn't supposed to care, who's "comfort" isn't the Marine Corps priority, who hasn't showered or had civilian contact in weeks. I get on the phone with him and just tell him how much I love and miss him and I have learned to not expect the same emotions back from him because he is used to leaving. He does so much to let me know he cares that I don't need words to assure me of that. Him leaving is his way of showing me and his family just how much he cares. To risk dying for the ones he really loves. And THAT is more than enough assurance for me.

Well I am just going stir crazy. It sounds ridiculous but I can't wait to cook and clean my own house. I just really want to cook and then eat off of our new dishes! His Mom and Step Dad will be coming to visit us soon too! So many exciting things to look forward too. I believe they are flying in on April 3rd and then we will be going to Vegas, which is going to be amazing.

Sometime next week we are going to a Pre-Deployment Brief. OHHH can't wait. I'm sure it will be very informative and all but I'm just really not looking forward to it. It is a for sure thing that he is going but this brief is going to make it seem very official in my head.

Entering Pre-Deployment stage = Reality Setting In


Thursday, March 11, 2010

Ramblings of a Lonely Wife...

I have never felt this lonely. I have moved my bed up against the wall so that when I sleep I can put a pillow next to the wall and scoot my back up against it...Yes, to feel like I have him laying behind me. Desperate? You could call it that. But I like to call it unfailing, true love. Cheesy I know, but no matter how long he is gone...a year or a day, I will always miss him the same.

So onto a survey that I found on a few other blogs, I think it's cute. I thought it would be informative for everyone and fun for me!

1. What are your middle names?
Kody and Michele.

2. How long have you been together?
5 months, married 2 months!

3. How long did you know eachother before you started dating?
2 days. Maybe 3?

4. Who asked who out?
He asked me... he was so confident that just after
two days I would for sure say yes.
And he was right.

5. How old are each of you?
I am 18 and he is 22.

6. Did you go to the same school?
No not even close.

7. Are you from the same hometown?

8. Who is the smartest?
I like to think I am but the truth is, he knows more
than I could ever know. I know random, useless facts
and he know's important, applicable to real life, common sense things.
The information he uses just for his job alone
is more than I think I will ever know.

9. What are each of your favorite things about the Corps?
My favorite thing is the pride it puts in you,
and also how it tests how emotionally strong
you are. I am not sure what his favorite thing is,
my guess would be his job. Not everything
that comes with his job but he loves
doing what he does for the Corps.

10. Who majored in what?
I am majoring in Early Childhood Education.
I want to teach kindergarten. He went straight from high school
and majored in being one helluva man/Marine.

11. Who is the most sensitive?
Haha. Neither one of us is very sensitive. I am sensitive
when I write, but not when I have to
speak. He is sensitive very deep inside
of his head and you have to know him really well to
realize when he is being sensitive.

12. Who has the worse temper?
Both of us are very easy-going and don't get mad easily.
We have never even raised our voices
at eachother. I am sure his temper
is different when he is at work.

13. How many children do you want?
I would like two but we have discussed three.
We'll see when we start having them.

14. Who does the cooking?
I do when I know he wants to eat as soon as
he walks in the door but he loves to help
me cook so we do it together a lot of the time.

15. Who is more social?
We both are but he has a lot more friends I think.
I talk to people that I don't know a lot but I
am not good at keeping in touch with
people or hanging out all of the time.

16. Who is the neat freak?
We both are but I do the majority of the cleaning.
I HAVE to have things clean. Makes things
easier and we both take pride in what we own.

17. Who is more stubborn?
HIM. He likes to do things his (Marine) way. I don't mind though.

18. Who wakes up earlier?
He is up very early, anywhere between 3 and 5 in the morning.
Me? I wake up and make him
breakfast, kiss him goodbye, crawl into bed and don't
wake up until I have a very good reason to.

19. Where was your first date?
The day we met we went out with friends to Olive Garden if that counts?

20. Who has the bigger family?
He has a pretty big family compared to mine.

21.Do you get flowers often?
No, but not because he doesn't want to get me some,
I just think they are a waste of money :)

22. How do you spend the holidays?
Well for Thanksgiving we spent it with my family and Christmas
we spent with his family in Ohio! Very fun.
Except that I wasn't used to the cold and was sick the entire time,
including during our wedding ceremony.

23.Who is more jealous?
We are both very confident and secure people. VERY.
I think that is why our chemistry is sooo hot.
But we do get jealous every so often to let eachother
know that others can look but not touch ;]

24. How long did it take for your relationship to get serious?
Well, we met at the end of September and
we started making wedding plans in November...
I knew I would marry him two weeks after we met.

25. Who eats more?
Him. I eat a lot too but can't keep up with him.

26. What do you do for a living?
I just hang out while he is busy preparing for war.
But seriously, I take care of a lot more than that.

27. Who does the laundry?
Either he does it by himself or I help him.
I am too scared to go to the laundry
room at our apartment by
myself and it is literally 20 feet from our door.
He doesn't let me go anywhere by myself anyway. We KNOW
how bad the world is...

28. Who drives when you go somewhere together?
If it is at night he drives because I have horrible
night vision. I drive during the day
because he hates traffic...

29. What is your song?
One boy, One girl by Tim Mcgraw. It is exactly how
we met and got married! But there
are quite a few songs that are special to us...

30. Who has a better singing voice?
My voice is awful. If he wasn't a Marine I would
be pushing him to sing country music,
he has the sexiest voice ever. I am not kidding.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Reality Shows, Twentynine Palms, and Trivia Night

Staying up late tonight waiting for Weikle to call. Talked to him for a second earlier and he was very, very, excited that he got to wash his hair today. Another Marine poured ice water over his head while he used shampoo. I laughed and said, "I can just see you guys doing that" he replied, "Babe, it's the little things in life that keep me going out here". It makes me happy and sad all at the same time when he says things like that. He also said that he misses my cooking, doesn't every wife like to hear that!? Food that requires you to add water and mix in a bag isn't exactly competition though. 9 days until he comes home, but who's counting?

There are a few things on my mind tonight, some things that are really bothering me and some that make me happy. I think I will start with the things bothering me and end on a lighter, happier note.

REALITY SHOWS. The shows I am talking about are shows such as: The Hills, The City (?), Kendra, Tori and Dean, Whatever the Kardashian show is, and some new show that follows 5 teens trying to make it "big". I am trying to refrain from cursing as I am typing. I mean come on, how ridiculous are these shows. If they are going to be called reality, lets show people some reality. Let us show things that really matter. Who cares if some celebrity is having a kid? People have kids all the time. The world is so clueless because instead of watching the news they watch shows of rich kids living in California and complaining about relationship drama, and celebrities delivering their own children. I could go on forever but I will stop there. That is my 5 minutes of bitching for today...

Subject number two, Twentynine Palms, California. The hubby's battalion was on live television today, pretty exciting! Made me feel somewhat closer to him. Also, I was reading an issue of Sunset magazine today from like 2007 and it had a list of the top ten unknown places to visit (and stay at) before you die. Guess what made the list? Yep, Twentynine Palms. Now I am sure they didn't mean the Marine Corps base there, there are other places to see, but it still made me laugh. I was thinking how disgustingly funny it would be if I made reservations at the hotel there for a vacation. He didn't think it was funny! Imagine that...

Now let me tell you about the greatest thing ever. Thunder Trivia Night at Majerles Sports Grill. I started going to this trivia night back in September 09 and loved it. Well with falling in love and getting married and all that I have not been back in quite a while. I am sooo in love with this trivia game. I think because it makes me think and I learn a lot of random facts that will never help me in life, ever. But, it is so much fun and really takes my mind off things. Let me put it this way; Majerles Sports Grill will be seeing me every Wednesday night between May and November. This bar is my getaway. I will be a trivia champion. Simple as that.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Days and Dishes

Hope everyone had a great weekend! I wouldn't say that mine was exciting (or anything close to exciting) but it was productive. 10 days until I am on my way back to California, 11 days until the hubby comes home. I am starting to get very anxious and have butterflies in my stomach. I am hoping that he gets back to base at a decent time so I can be there waiting for him, he will be sooo surprised. Eeek! I'm way to anxious, I am gonna love him to pieces when I see him... But for now, he is in the middle of nowhere, freezing in the rain. He doesn't mind it, but I hate not being able to feed him and love on him like a wife should be able to do.


Back in December when Weikle and I registered for our wedding we went to Dillards and Bed Bath and Beyond. Well, when we walked through the door at Dillards we started walking through where all the dishes were out on display. I saw a set of dishes I loved and stopped to look at them. To my surprise, he loved them too. Who would have thought? A Marine who eats his food in under 3 minutes actually cared about what dishes we would eat off for the next 10 years or so. We must have stood there for 10 minutes "Ooing" and "Awwing" over these dishes. Anyway, we registered for the dishes along with a bunch of other stuff. So those of you that were at the reception probably saw how drunk my husband got, and if you weren't there I will recap the night for you. Pictures started at 4:30 and by 5 he was already buzzing pretty bad. The actual reception started at 7 and he was already drunk. By 10 (which is when all the "wedding events" were done taking place) it was time to take him to the hotel. Then he was sick for a little while and fell asleep. He never drinks because of his job and always being tired but he had a blast that night! Me, being the wonderful wife I am, drove to where the reception was held at 6am and opened all of our gifts, loaded them all in the car, picked him up from the hotel and drove 5 hours back to Cali (with him throwing up the whole way home haha). So back to the gift opening... we had recieved the mugs that went to the dish set that we both loved. When we had gotten back to California I went to the mall to buy the rest of the dishes and they didn't have a Dillards at the mall. What mall doesn't have a Dillards? Come on now. But just a few days ago, I bought the dishes here in Arizona.

Aren't they amazing!? I want to use them so bad! This is just half the dishes. The dinner plates, bowls, and dessert plates are all the dark chocolate brown you see on these dishes. I have unwrapped them about 3 times to look at them. Can you say obsessive!?

One last thing I will leave you with:

There are only two kinds of people that understand Marines: Marines and the enemy. Everyone else has a second-hand opinion.

--Gen. William Thornson, U.S. Army

Thursday, March 4, 2010

An Unknown Sender

Got this picture yesterday from an unknown sender, apparently the unknown sender had signal on his iPhone, it took me a minute to realize it was my crazy husband and his friend. It made both me and my mom laugh. It feels good to know that he is thinking of me as much as I am thinking of him.

Took some time today to write thank you's for my bridal shower gifts and wedding gifts. Actually it was A LOT of time, but I enjoyed it.

Not many updates on anything, hubby has been working long days and has not been able to talk long. We were, however, talking about buying me a new vehicle before he leaves. I got a MAYBE out of him. Since I will be working and catching up on school while he is gone it would be nice to have a reliable vehicle. BUT if we don't end up getting one I am sure I can deal with my car for another year.

Working almost a full time job while he is gone is my plan. I want to stay busy and make some extra money for us. Hopefully it won't be extremely hard to find a job (crossing my fingers) but I'm sure it won't be easy. We are supposed to be going to human resources on base when he gets home so I can get information on how to get a job once I relocate. Anybody who knows of any job openings is welcome to inform me! They say networking is the best way to find a job in this economy, so let the networking begin ladies and gentlemen!

For now I am just counting down the days (14) until he comes home. Trying to stay busy and on top of everything while he is gone. Hopefully he will come home without a worry on his mind (doubt it!). But that is my job, to take care of things while he is away and make the most of his coming home. I am going to kiss him and clutch on him til he just can't take it anymore.

And the last thing I will write is a letter...

Dear Twentynine Palms, California,

Give me back my husband!! Thanks.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

You Know You're a Marine Wife When...

The newest picture of the hubby. He sent this to me yesterday because he finally got service on his phone! It's amazing what one picture can do...Sooo it is about 17 more days until he comes home and I cannot wait. I might even cry when I see him! I sound like such a girl, I know, but I miss him terribly. I feel like I am just waiting time until he comes home, like my life is on pause until he is here again... I feel anxious all the time because I know there is so much we could be doing right now. But on the brighter side, we have made all kinds of plans of things to do before he leaves for Afghan.! We want to go on a hot air balloon ride, walk the beach at night, spend a whole day watching movies of my choice, VEGAS with his parents and mine, go see hollywood, go to the gaslamp district in San Diego, and the list goes on... We will be busy spending time with eachother and taking in all of the little moments of life...

Found this online, thought it was really cute. My comments and additions are in purple!

-You can roll his sleeves better than he can.
(Weikle rolls his own sleeves but we both think that sloppily rolled sleeves are disgusting!)

-You know to stay off base between 1130-1400, unless you absolutely can't help it.
(Atleast don't go anywhere near a place that sells food)

-You know his "last four" better than your own.
(I still know mine but I use his a lot more than my own)

-You find yourself up late at night doing his MCI's because he has to get up early and needs to rest.

-You get out your Military ID at Walmart without thinking about it.
(You get it out for everything without thinking about it)

-You've said "Good to go", "Roger that", and "Oorah" without noticing it.
(I say "good to go" allllll the time but not roger that or oorah, but I love hearing him say it on the phone!)

-You think his skivvy shorts are hot.
(Definitely not. For those of you who don't know, skivvy shorts are very short green shorts they wear to PT (physical training) in. I laugh when he leaves the apartment wearing them! His legs are VERY white)

-At a distance you can pick out your husband out of 100 men with the same clothes and haircut.
(By the way he stands and walks!)

-You're more "moto" than he is.
(Moto means you love everything related to the Corps and tend to want to buy everything associated with the Marine Corps. He understands that I am a very proud Marine wife and lets me buy some things, but he tells me when I have gone overboard LOL)

-You know that "field day" has nothing to do with a field.
(He is sooo thankful that he does not have to field day anymore...)

-You know the exact day he switches from woodlands to deserts and vice-versa.

-You know the exact measurements of his ribbons and medals on his uniform.
(He knows them, I just make sure they aren't crooked)

-You know how to cut a "high and tight".
(He has been in long enough that he doesn't get a "high and tight" but I have had to cut his "low fade" a couple times now and they were not good!)

-You know what boot bands are and find them all over the house.
(I wear his boot bands when I roll my jeans up, they are amazing!)

-You can pack his sea bag better than he can.
(He is very good at packing, but I just used his sea bag when I flew to AZ because we don't have any other luggage!)

-You know what motomail is and it is your lifeline.

-All of your closets are full of his things (gear, uniforms) and your shoes and purses are not even in the closet for this reason.

-Your kitchen cabinets have MRE's in them.
(Meals Ready to Eat, packaged food they eat during field opps.)

-Your vocabulary consists mostly of Marine related acronyms.

- You jump out of the shower with a full head of soap to answer the phone, private number, and weird area codes are what you're hoping will show up on caller ID.

-Everytime you watch a military related movie your husband tears it apart on how bad it is or makes comments on how surprisingly accurate they made it.
(He should be a movie critic!)

-You are used to your husband leaving while it is dark and coming home when it is dark everyday.
(Such long days without him, 0300 or 0400 in the morning until 1700 or 1800)

-You have been told to stop thinking like a PFC does.
(Private First Class, low rank in the Marine Corps. I hear this once a week atleast!)

-You pack a lunch everyday that could feed 5 civilians.
(It is almost disgusting how much food he eats!)

-It takes you an hour to cook a huge dinner and when you sit down to eat it your husband mixes all the food together and is done in approximately 3 minutes.
(I have the Marine Corps to thank for this, along with a million other things...)

Monday, March 1, 2010

Seconds, Days, Months, Years, MOMENTS

Moments are what define my life right now, moments that are spent with my husband; moments that I will play over and over in my head for the seven to ten months he is in Afghanistan. TEN MONTHS (didn't know it could be ten). 8,000 miles will soon separate us. These miles will soon separate the kisses that I rely on every time I have a bad day. These miles will separate his hands from playing with my hair when we watch The Office (Our Fave TV show) together. But most of all, these miles will separate US, and put him in some of the most dangerous situations where he will be forced to make some of the most difficult decisions he will ever have to make. This separation will put him somewhere where the people living there want nothing more than to see him dead. While I will be put somewhere where the majority of people don't know that everyday I will be waiting for a letter that lets me know he is alive. He is my best friend, the person I confide in, I rely on him for so much. Seconds, days, months, years; these are all measurements of time and I have learned to hate them as much I LOVE HIM. These words used to measure time do nothing for me, yet moments can almost make me feel the warmth of his hug, the smell of his cologne, the roughness of his chin... People ask how I am going to handle my husband being gone for so long and my answer is always the same: I have no idea.

Day by day, week by week, because I know that is what he will be doing. Every time he reaches in his back pocket to pull out that picture of me he will be remembering our last kiss, our last words, AND THAT will get him through the days... just like it will for me. I may be falling apart while he is gone but when I write to him I will be strong, I will be doing great, because I know that what I am going through is nothing compared to what he is.

I pray and pray that he comes back to me, and that the time we spend apart will seem more like days rather than months. I pray that he does his job and does it to the best of his ability for all of us here in America. I pray that he will continue to love what he does, that he will love the cause he is fighting for.... like he always has.

Semper Fidelis My Love.

For those of you who don't know, Semper Fidelis means "Always Faithful". Same goes for Semper Fi.